Blow a kiss, Fire a Gun
by crackedconcrete
Summary: When Sheriff Swan drives past the Mills's mansion, she hear loud music pulsating out; which is strange for the usually silent building. She goes in to investigate, only to find a very drunk Regina dancing in a way that has Emma's mouth watering / SwanQueen drabble/ficlet.


a/n: this is just a little somethin'-somethin' to entertain myself while my muse is off doing Lord knows what. so this is just a little ficlet? (is that the correct term? I have no idea) that hit me while listening to Major Lazer &amp; DJ Snake's new song 'Lean On'. It's pretty big in Australia right now so I figured I'd write to it!  
Slow motion dirty dancing by a drunk Regina... anyone? :D  
I hope you enjoy it and I really wanted it to be very visual so you could imagine it how I do/did xx

SQSQSQ

The brisk evening air stung Emma's cheeks as she patrolled the tiny town of StoryBrooke in the station's cruiser. With the windows rolled all the way down, her Jimi Hendrix CD playing through the speakers and a mega takeaway cup of Granny's wicked mix of cocoa and cinnamon, Emma was rather relaxed with the fact that this evening was Friday and she was working. She turned down Mifflin and slowed the vehicle to a crawl as she inspected Regina's bright white mansion. This was her favourite part of the evening because she'd flick the Mayor a quick text and ten minutes later, said Mayor would stalk out the front door holding a plate of whatever she had for dinner. Emma thought it was fabulous. The two women had now become something more than friends, neither knowing what it was but both thankful that they had stopped fighting.

Emma tapped a quick message and as she was about to press send she heard a bizarre tune pulse out from Regina's house. The Sheriff knew that Regina had an eclectic taste in music, but even this was pushing it. Emma turned Jimi down and parked the car right outside the brunette's house. She also knew the Mayor had a kick arse sound system and almost laughed out when the song was instantly turned up. She swore the panes of glass in the front door were shaking.

Everyone knew that occasionally the Mayor drank… and by occasionally; every Friday night. Sometimes with Kathryn, Ruby and Tink, sometimes by herself, either way; she drank. Emma shook her head as she slammed shut the car door behind her. She wondered how sloshed the Mayor was already to be having the music _that_ loud.

_'Blow a kiss, fire a gun; _

_We need someone to lean on._

_ Blow a kiss, fire a gun,_

_All we need is somebody to lean on'_.

Emma figured it was pointless to knock because Regina wouldn't hear even if she barged her front door down with a damn sledgehammer. She slipped in, leaving the front door slightly ajar. No idiot would dare break in with the police cruiser parked out front.

'_Do you recall, not long ago,_

_We would walk on the sidewalk,_

_Innocent, remember?_

_All we did was care for each other_'.

Emma tiptoed, albeit pointless in the noise, around the corner and poked her head into the kitchen. Since about the age of twelve, Emma Swan knew she was gay, but the situation playing out in front of her definitely solidified her sexuality.

'_But the night was warm,_

_We were bold and young,_

_All around the wind blows,_

_We would only hold on to let go'_.

Two bottles of Jack Daniels sat on the counter; one on its side, empty, lying in a pool of condensation, and the other, half full and upright with a shot glass next to it. But Regina had Emma faltering. The brunette was still obviously dressed from her day at work and Emma cursed herself for turning down the Mayor's offer of lunch because if she had known Regina was dressed like this today, she would have gone in a heartbeat. The Mayor's back was to Emma but the officer didn't care; it simply enhanced the whole situation. Many a night, Emma had been plagued with dreams of Regina doing things to her that Mother Superior couldn't even cleanse her from. Seeing Regina sway and gyrate her hips with her hands flared up above her head like the true Latina she was had Emma salivating.

Regina Mills makeup was still perfect, her mauve lips parted slightly in pure ecstasy. Her white blouse still done up and tucked into the skin tight high waisted grey skirt she donned, but Emma's eyes drifted down to the stockings. They were magnificent; they were goddamn back-seamed stockings that made the Mayor's calves look like they deserved to be draped over Emma's shoulders. Emma swallowed thickly as she took in the whole image; a very drunk Regina dancing dirty to a curious song.

'_Blow a kiss, fire a gun,_

_We need someone to lean on. _

_Blow a kiss, fire a gun,_

_All we need is somebody to lean on'_.

Emma let the drunken Mayor do a whole rotation – watching the whole thing so she could use it for some _special alone time_ – until she cleared her throat.

"Regina?" but she wasn't listening.

_'What will we do when we get old?_

_Will we walk down the same road?_

_Will you be there by my side?_

_Standing strong as the waves roll over?'_

Emma took a tentative step forward but yelped when her foot made contact with a sticky splodge. She looked down to see dried alcohol. Regina was going to have a ball cleaning this up tomorrow morning.

"Regina!" the Sheriff let out a exasperated sigh and just as she was about to grab at the drunk woman's wrist, the Mayor opened her mouth and a singing voice that Emma didn't even know existed sung out,

"When the nights are long, longing for you to come home, all around the wind blows, we would only hold on to let go,"

Emma blinked, double checking that was in fact Regina Mills who sung out beautifully and not just the singer in the dreadfully catchy song. Emma reached out once again but her fingers grazed at the soft material of the Mayor's shirt as Regina bent her knees and swayed her backside towards Emma's direction.

"Oh shit," Emma gulped and felt the blood drain from her face as Regina flicked her hair over her shoulder. Somehow throughout all of this, Regina Mills still hadn't noticed Emma Swan's presence which was surprising considering Emma was practically drooling over the very provocative Mayor of StoryBrooke.

'_Blow a kiss, fire a gun,_

_We need someone to lean on._

_Blow a kiss, fire a gun,_

_All we need is somebody to lean on'_.

There was a moment of silence in the song and Emma took the opportunity to screech out Regina's name. Emma half expected the Mayor to turn around, blush and demand that the Sheriff exit her property immediately, but Regina throw her head over her shoulder and gave Emma a salacious wink.

"Emma dear, play the song again won't you?"

"I…" Emma stuttered. She was determined to stand her ground and make up some bull shit excuse to turn off the music but no one in this town, bar Emma herself, would ever make a complaint against the Mayor.

"Please?" Regina pouted and Emma steeled herself against the onslaught of arousal destroying the lower half of her body, "aw baby," she glanced down and up again through her thick lashes, and Emma was putty, "such a party pooper,"

The Sherriff clicked replay and Regina broke into a smile that'd outshine the sun and leaned over the island counter to reach the whiskey. Emma zeroed in on the Mayor's delightful backside and Regina cleared her throat as the Sheriff none-to-subtly licked her lips. Regina lifted a single Louboutin up so the spiked heel brushed the hem of her skirt.

"See something you like Sheriff?" Regina husked as she slowly unscrewed the lid of the half-filled Jack Daniels. Emma averted her eyes and swallowed,

"Yeah, whiskey,"

Emma spotted sadness in Regina's mocha brown eyes as she neared, her fingers touching her firearm briefly. Although they both knew that Emma was working, Regina poured the Sheriff a shot and wordlessly slid it over to the brooding blonde. Emma stared down at the brown liquid, debating whether or not to take it and Regina bit her bottom lip watching the Sheriff choose.

"Take the shot Sheriff,"

The Mayor's voice was almost an octave lower than before and Emma looked up in curiosity. Regina's pupils had dilated, "Take it,"

Emma was no stranger to drinking and knew that she was as bad as Regina in the ability to consume large quantities of alcohol.

"Take it dearie, before I do,"

"I think you've had enough alcohol for this evening, Madame Mayor," Emma wrapped her fingers around the small glass, threw her head back and down the shot without even a single wince.

"Good girl," Regina sneered, her voice dangerous but her face still as innocent as an angel, "dance with me Sheriff,"

'_But the night was warm_

_We were bold and young_

_All around the wind blows_

_We would only hold on to let go'_.

When the Mayor said dance, she clearly meant to just throw the bewildered Sheriff against the walk-in pantry door and grind up against her. Not that Emma minded.

Emma squeezed her eyes shut, hoping that for some weird reason that this was a dream but also praying that it wasn't. Regina was everywhere and nowhere at the same time. Emma couldn't see her but Lord she could feel her; her hand on her hip, the other cupping the back of her neck. Her hips, those goddamn hips, ground themselves into Emma's pelvis as the song played again for the second time.

_'All we need is somebody to lean on' _

Emma gasped as Regina's breath caressed her neck and collarbone; her lips ghosting over flustered skin. The Sheriff opened her eyes just as the Mayor turned her back to her, and crashed her backside right into the apex of Emma's jean clad thighs.

"Regina, good God," the Sheriff whispered through clenched teeth.

The Mayor let out a peal of deliciously dangerous laughter and snatched Emma's roaming hand from off of her lower back and guided it towards her front to grope her left breast.

"Oh Sherriff Swan," Regina panted and Emma's eyebrows shot up into her hairline as the Mayor dissolved into a fit of giggles, "oh Emma, right there, yes, there,"

Even though the Mayor didn't mean it like how she did, Emma couldn't help but mentally store all the words, "Yes, yes, oh, ooh baby, yeah,"

Emma continued to palm Regina's boob like her life depended on it. But as Emma silently went about her groping, Regina spun around in her arms.

"Time's up Sherriff," the brunette leaned forward, her lips touching Emma's briefly, "song's finished and you have a job to do,"


End file.
